“The heart has eyes which the brain knows nothing of.” ~Charles H. Perkhurst
“The obscure we see eventually. The completely obvious, it seems, takes longer.” ~ Edward R. Murrow
“The question is not what you look at, but what you see.” ~Henry David Thoreau
About three times a week, I drive through and get myself an iced tea (weaning myself off of Starbucks coffee). I usually go to the same fast food chain drive-through, but not necessarily the same location. This particular chain, SONIC, experiences a tremendous amount of traffic in any given hour.
I have made it a point when asked “How can I help you?” to first say, “Hi, how are you doing today?” in a very sincere and friendly voice. What a HUGE difference this has made in the service I receive.
I have always been polite at a drive-though, but now I slow down and take those extra few seconds to really acknowledge the individual who is helping me by asking how they are doing. They can hear in my voice that I really want to know. The result has been super friendly replies, like “I’m doing great, and how is your day going?” and other similar sentiments. I can totally tell by the surprised and almost shocked responses I get that most of the people I speak with this way rarely get a friendly greeting that speaks directly to them personally.
The other day, instead of driving through, I sat outside and ordered my tea from the ordering booth on the patio, using the same friendly tone. A car-hop brought me my drink and I sat down. Soon after, three individuals came to the patio to order, and they were somewhat demanding and unfriendly—although not really outright rude, just all about themselves—totally oblivious to the human spirit working diligently on the other side of the speaker. It made me a little sad for the way we go about unaware and unconscious a lot of the time.
Since using my new greeting consistently, I have been called “sweetie”, “hun”, and “love” by some overly appreciative sales girls (is that what you call the ladies who work at the drive-though?). I have to tell you, this simple gesture has really opened my eyes to how much we all just want to be “seen” (even though you can’t see someone at first in a drive through).
Being “Seen”
Being “seen” means being acknowledged and it also means experiencing a connection even if for a brief moment. Being seen means being appreciated and respected, even praised when it’s appropriate.
Seeing others means you come from the vantage point that all of our lives, all of our wallets, all of our jobs, and all of our time schedules matter and are valued just like we value our own.
Seeing others means dropping the manipulative tactics to get what we want, and letting go of the rudeness that tells someone we think they are less important than we are.
Seeing is believing, too. When we “see” our employees, they begin to believe in us more, and we in them. When we “see” our vendors, we embrace them as part of our team, not as adversaries that are out to stick us. When we “see” our co-workers, we understand that they are building their professional lives just as we are, and we see that is important to them just as it is important to us. When we “see” our customers, we are able to be amazingly thankful that with all of the many wonderful choices they have, and with all of the options at their disposal, they are willing to see us and give us a try—either for the first time or once again. When we ourselves are customers, and we “see” sales people, tellers, wait staff, professional service providers, clerks, and attendants, we open not only our eyes, but our hearts and our opportunities as well.
It takes only an instant to become aware in any given situation. It takes just a second to re-adjust bad thinking, and clear the air of any bad attitude that would cause us to not see another. The moment you notice yourself heading down the wrong communications road, it’s time to look and SEE.
The wonderful thing about seeing others is that by doing so you begin to see yourself, and best of all you also begin to be seen, and once again we come full circle (something I love to do).
So this week, see and be seen. Open your mind, your heart, your voice, your consideration to others, and see how it makes all the difference in your business and in your life (and of course it will never hurt your profits either).
“A wise woman puts a grain of sugar into everything she says to a man, and takes a grain of salt with everything he says to her.” ~Helen Rowland
My Version: “A wise business person puts a grain of sugar into everything he says to a customer, and takes a grain of salt with everything the customer says to him.”
We have become non-thinkers. Even the massive amounts of caffeine we drink may not be waking us up.
I went to Barnes & Noble Café the other day for a cup of coffee. I went out of my way to go there instead of to my usual coffee house because my daughter wanted to look at a book.
I ordered my coffee (almost 4 bucks) with 1 Splenda.
“We’re out of Splenda” the clerk let me know quite boldly. I said, “Do you think you might have just one packet stashed away somewhere?” “No” I was told straight up.
“O.K., I’ll look through my purse”, I said, but with all of my vigorous purse-digging, I didn’t find a single packet, so I did the only logical thing (to me), I cancelled my coffee order. The clerk proceeded to let me know, “We ran out a couple of days ago—we forgot to order it. Everyone’s been asking for Splenda. Everyone wants Splenda, but we’re out, and we can’t serve it until we re-order, and the new shipment doesn’t come until next week.”
“Duh”, I thought, but instead I just said, “Someone COULD go to the grocery store and buy a box”. The response was a numbing and hard-to-hear, “I’ll talk to my manager about that”. I left the café without the joy of sipping that coffee, and they watched me leave with my cash still in my pocket instead of in their register. The clerk couldn’t care less. And who knows, that could have been the loss of quite a few sales in the course of a few hours—or over the course of a week.
I wandered around the book store, and as I did, I kept thinking about that sweet little coffee mess. I thought about it in terms of running a business and in terms of customer connection. I also thought, “I could totally use some new material”, plus I HAD to have some fun (there’s just not much to do in my town), so I went into the bookstore and asked if the café’ manager was in. Lucky for me he was. I had the good fortune to chat with him about the “incident”, about blogging, and about business in general, and his in particular.
This guy (and I swear his name was Joe—but not “Java” Joe, just Joe) was fairly nice, but also completely clueless and on auto-pilot. He just did not get it, so I had a little fun with him. I challenged him that a coffee shop ALWAYS requires the sweeteners that customers are used to, and that a trip to the store could have solved his customers’ woes. He looked uncomfortable as we spoke, and he had all kinds of excuses and real important “corporate talk” about “procedure” and “sources” and the “protocol” of having to get EVERYTHING from their “special” supplier. I challenged, “So you have NEVER run out of milk at the café’ and had to go to the grocery store to get some?” Then, he tongue-stumbled around for a while before he half-way admitted that he had. “So what’s the difference if it’s Splenda or milk?” I insisted.
Again, I was just making a point and having a good time (at his expense I should be ashamed to say). Of course, we both knew that he could have just bought some Splenda. He was just being careless or lazy or just not thinking. I even went so far as to say, “You know, if it really is true that everything has to come from corporate (except the milk that you occasionally buy locally), then you could have called corporate and asked them to overnight you a small box of Slenda just to get by until the order arrives next week.” His hilarious and yet not-so-shocking reply was, “We can’t, the cost of that would be exorbitant!” Oh, and the cost of loss sales isn’t?
AUTO-PILOT! NO THINKING involved here, just non-thinking, just the system (that doesn’t work), just the way WE do it, just RIDICULOUS!
That café’ manager didn’t care enough about what the customers want to stop at the store and pick up some sweetener (or corporate didn’t care enough about the customers to let him). Hey, it’s a coffee shop for gosh sakes. They sell mostly coffee. People either use sugar, Splenda, Equal, or Sweet & Low in their coffee drinks, and most are loyal to just one of those. If you sell coffee, you MUST have those basics on hand at all times.
It may sound harsh, but to me this was an example of really lousy (and likely super inexpensive—yet quite costly) management. The manager failed to see that the Splenda supply was going low, then he failed to re-order (by the way, that stuff has a LOOOOONG shelf life, so re-ordering a little early wouldn’t have done any harm), then (o.k., we all make mistakes) when he failed to see that he failed to reorder, he failed to go to the grocery store and get some. He also failed to recognize that he is the steward of someone else’s money and profits, and he allowed the company to lose sales, all because he is likely on non-thinking auto pilot. But he is not the only one. Someone hired this guy (and if you insist it’s not his fault, then know that someone hired the guy or gal who supposedly won’t let him go to the store for Splenda).
WHY bother being in the coffee business if the customer’s experience will be flat or anything less than everything they expect? In that case, you’re just advertising (and paying to do it) that you’re not all that great—that you don’t care all that much about what your customers expect for their money.
I honestly did not care one bit when the clerk told me the shipment was coming next week (or when the manager told me his stories and fed me his excuses). All I cared about at that moment at the coffee shop was MY coffee, and that’s how we all are, at least some of the time. Your customers don’t really care about you all that much. They care about what THEY want and feel they need WHEN they feel they need it.
However, YOU MUST care about them, even when all they usually care about is themselves (sorry, but that’s how it works—don’t worry, it builds character).
Maybe you don’t sell coffee. Maybe your cup is full of furniture, design services, wellness, or personal development. Do you offer a selection of “condiments” the customers should naturally expect? Are you consistent with them? Do you think it would be o.k. to “run out” or be without any of them at any time?
It may be o.k. for you, but being without a little packet of what the customers feel they want and need is a big business mistake.
This coffee story is a small example of how we often do things day-to-day in our businesses. We get lazy in our jobs and luke-warm in our routines. It becomes about us, and not about the customers, and certainly not about profits (so DON’T kid yourself). We quit engaging, we quit solving, we quit listening, we quit brainstorming, and we quit caring.
So, WHAT is YOUR Splenda? What are you out of that you can easily replace? What do your customers count on that you are just too “routine-ized” or lazy (gosh forbid) to get for them. What simple thing could keep you from losing sales? What could certainly make your business a lot sweeter for others?
Do yourself and your customers a favor. Get yourself and your business off AUTO-PILOT. Wake up your employees, too, and tomorrow, when you reach for that morning coffee, remember that a little packet of “pluggin-in” can lead to stimulated sales.
“Efficiency is doing things right. Effectiveness is doing the right things.” ~Peter F. Drucker
We have all heard of the 80/20 rule (also known as the Pareto Principle) at one time or another, but we tend to ignore its real power in our work and personal lives.
The concept of the 80/20 rule was first written about by the Italian economist Vilfredo Pareto, way back in 1895, hence the name Pareto Principle. This savvy economist noticed that in his society, there was a clear distinction of types of people in regard to money, prestige, power, and influence. He saw that there was a “top” 20% which he coined the “vital few”, and a “bottom” 80% which he termed the “trivial many”.
This economic finding caused Pareto to look further into his premise of an 80/20 rule, and he discovered that almost all activity was in line with this principle, too, which basically states that 20% of effort and activity will produce 80% of the results from that effort or activity. This is a phenomenal finding, and one that can help us to be more successful in our day and not waste time, money, or effort in our lives and in our businesses.
Based on the 80/20 rule, 80% of what you wear comes from only 20% of your wardrobe and 80% of what you eat when you go out for meals comes from a measly 20% of the restaurants you frequent! 80% of the free time you use visiting with the people you know well is spent with just 20% of those people.
Now let’s apply the principle to your business. You could bet that approximately 80% of all of your sales comes from just 20% of your customers, and about 80% of all of the profits in you business come from only about 20% of the products and services you offer. A whopping 80% of what your customers complain about likely comes from 20% of your offerings.
You can further assume that roughly 20% of the activities you spend your time on will result in 80% of the meaningful results you desire. So out of every ten things you set out to do, two of those activities will pack a powerful punch in terms of getting you moving ahead in a substantial way, and they will benefit you more than the other eight put together! Best of all, those two activities may take the same amount of time, or even less time, than any of the other eight taken individually.
Obviously then, you need to take a long hard look at your to do list each and every day, and try to decipher, from past experience, from the experiences of others, from past results, from your GUT, and from your good common sense, which one or two activities you should focus on or do first and foremost each day, and let the other tasks take a back seat (you can also delegate these). Spend your first efforts daily on the “vital few” activities, and AVOID doing the “trivial many” activities if your “vital few” are not yet done. Spending time on the “vital few” or the most results-oriented tasks is KEY to your definite success.
The vital activities that deserve your focus can be finding ways of improving products that are not working, or eliminating them altogether. Or your vital activities may be calling customers who you value most. Vital activities could be finding the team members who are producing, connecting, and innovating, and spending time with them, or finding ways to use their skills to help others in the organization or to help the organization itself. Your vital activities may involve organizing strategic creativity sessions with the intent of developing one new product. Your vital activities may be to finish developing a meaningful product or service that you halted because you got sidetracked.
As a business person, business manager, or manager of self, FOCUS on what matters most. Avoid the constant trivial interruptions that take your focus away, and especially avoid the overly-needy people who sap your energy and time. Learn to delegate tasks, and learn to assign sales associates or employees to a mentor who can help them, or simply remove the bottom 20% of tasks that are not necessary, and the bottom 20% people who are stagnant, lazy, disruptive, unwilling, or who will not think for themselves once they have been taught the ropes.
The Pareto Principle is a useful tool we can all use to manage our businesses and our lives. If you have a choice concerning which activities to invest your time in (and you do), which people to visit and associate with, which customers to follow up on and stay in contact with, which products and services to sell, and which projects to develop further, choose the 20% that will bring the most desirable, the most peaceful, and the moist profitable results.
Now do the math for your own personal life and business, and get ready to see AMAZING things begin to happen for you and those around you.
“Great things are only possible with outrageous requests.” ~Thea Alexander
WHAT DO YOU WANT?
It’s so mind-boggling that we work our tushies off, stay up late, get up early, take courses, attend seminars, get degrees, and run around like our heads are down the street and we have to hurry and get them, but we often ignore doing the simplest thing to get what we want: We don’t ASK!
We have not, because we ask not.
Sometimes we ask not because we are too busy playing games. Sometimes we ask not because we are tired. We may ask not because we are too proud (the bad kind of pride) or because we don’t want to look needy. Sometimes we ask not because we are stubborn. We may ask not because we think we are being humble and thoughtful of others.
As much as we ask not, you’d think it would pay off. Instead, we have not.
What if you suddenly made a decision to do things differently?
What if you decided that you would begin to ask?
This may help…
You already know you are a good person, right? You already know you are kind. You already know you are hard-working. You already know you are intelligent and skilled. You already know you would not take advantage of others. You already know you are fair. You already know you would do for others if they asked you (in most reasonable cases anyway). So stop over-thinking what you think other people will think. WHAT do you have to lose by asking? The truth is, you have nothing to lose, but only new and exciting experiences and benefits to gain.
I’ll tell you, false humility and ego have kept more people down than lack of money, lack of education, or lack of any kind of resources. NOT ASKING KILLS US! It kills our relationships and our businesses, it kills our friendships and our bodies, and it kills our spirits, too.
Not asking means we do everything ourselves. Not asking means we don’t get the sale. Not asking means we don’t get what we want in friendships and marriages. Not asking means we are passed up for the raise, the promotion, the new product line (that our competitor ends up getting because they asked first).
Not asking means we get a higher interest rate. Not asking means we pay a higher percentage to the real estate agency. Not asking means we eat alone (hey, even if we get turned down, we would have eaten alone anyway)!
We ASSUME other people know what we want. NO, NO, NO, THEY DO NOT. They are busy, they are consumed with their own day, and no offense, but they are not thinking too totally much of you throughout the day. You have goals, needs, tasks, and desires that others can help you meet, yet you do not ask.
But, ASKING…AHHHHHHHH, ASKING!
Asking means we get more love and snuggles. Asking means we get to hold someone’s hand. Asking means we get more sales. Asking means our commission just went up. Asking means we get to work with amazing people. Asking means we become part of THAT team, asking means we get to pick our date up in that really cool car. Asking means we get what we want that wasn’t on the menu. Asking means we are so much less tired because now we have the proper amount of help. Asking means we make a lot more money, and a lot more profit, too!
Asking means we let ourselves be human. Asking means we allow others to have the joy of sowing into our lives. Asking means someone else gets an opportunity to function in more responsibility while we get some needed rest. Asking means we are happier. Asking means we are warmer and more connected. Asking means we don’t burden others by expecting them to know what we want. Asking means we become grown-ups and take responsibility for our lives, giving up the tendency to complain about what we don’t have.
Go ahead: Ask for the sale, the raise, the special product. Ask for the backrub, the conversation, the love. Ask for the interest rate, the promotion, the price. Ask for the help, the nap, the puppy. Ask for the chicken sandwich with the sauce that normally goes with the roast beef dip.
You have not because you ask not, and I promise, you can have more, and be happier, if you will simply ask for—VOICE—what you want.
“The good Lord gave you a body that can stand most anything. It’s your mind you have to convince.” ~Vince Lombardi
This week I will share with you My 8 Proven Business-Building Tips that you can apply to your business (store-front or home-based) to build it to success. Most have to do with your mindset first, which in turn will direct your actions towards precisely focused effort to get you where you desire to be.
These practical and very doable tips are research-based and have been proven over and over again. They lead to success for the business professional who will practice them.
These tips are easy to put into action.
1. When you are not selling, MARKET your business
If you do not have an appointment on any given day, market yourself during the time you would normally be on an appointment. Think about a person who is seeking full time employment. To be successful in finding a job quickly (which would in turn generate money quickly), a person seeking a job should make their full time job the task of getting a job. Similarly, if you do not have a client or a lead, make your full time (or part time) job the task of marketing to get leads and appointments. Before long you will have a steady flow of clients.
Create Awareness (market) by doing events related to your industry or niche, writing articles, or getting your materials out there in your community. A few examples from my previous decorating business include distributing flyers, doing decorating seminars for the public, partnering with a builder and putting over a dozen sample treatments in his showroom, and writing a decorating advice column every Sunday in the Home Section of an area newspaper in conjunction with a local real estate company, to name just a few. I got many exceptional leads and sales as a result of doing these tasks, and it did not take long at all.
2. DON’T pre-judge who you think will buy from you: Target your marketing but be good to EVERYONE
Market to your target groups, and then serve every one who comes to you from these activities. NEVER be hasty to judge a book by its cover (especially when that book approaches YOU)!
Get out there in your local community and network. At events, strike up conversations and be polite and kind to everyone that you meet. Even if someone is seemingly not your potential client, remember that people have bosses and acquaintances and relatives. People tell people, and people who cannot afford your services right now tell people who can. Someone who cannot afford your products now may be in a position to purchase them later, and they will remember how you interacted with them when they couldn’t buy.
One time, when I had a storefront design studio, a woman came in dressed in ragged jeans and a t-shirt, and from her appearance I absolutely assumed she was someone who could not afford my products and services. She just did not look the part AT ALL. I thought she was someone who was waiting for the bus or had missed it, and was just coming into my shop to cool off from the hot Texas summer heat. However, I treated her the same way I did any other prospect (or any person): I was kind, courteous, and gave her my undivided time and attention. Little did I know she lived in one of the biggest homes in the most “well-to-do” subdivision in our area. I ended up doing custom cornices for her very large family room and it was a wonderful job with a very nice profit.
3. “Losing” a sale is still a positive thing
When you lose a sale, you are a step closer to your closing rate goal. Remember that in order to have an optimal closing rate (60-80% for most industries), you will have to lose some sales. Even a lead that did not become a sale can lead to a referral sale if you remain professional and courteous. Think about it in a positive light. Hearing one “no” means you are much closer to the “YES”!
4. Our futures and fortunes are in the follow through!
Follow-up on ALL of your prospects, even the ones you KNOW (or rather, think you know) will not buy. Through your follow-up they will see that you care, and through your sincere communication, you may get the real reason for the lost sale. This gives you another opportunity to actually make the sale by helping the prospect to overcome any fear, misconception, or obstacle that was standing in the way for them.
Suppose you did not follow-up with a prospect because you just assumed they were not going to buy, so “why bother”. Then, that prospect suddenly realized that they could make the extra room in their budget after all. There is a very great chance that the prospect WILL NOT CALL YOU after the initial sales presentation even if they figured out a way to broaden their budget. Instead, they may just go forward until another buying opportunity presents itself, and someone else will get that sale. On the other hand, if you simply follow-up—perhaps a week later and then maybe again in a month or two— they may interact with you and give you their business. Our fortunes are certainly in the follow through.
5. Invest in your business
Make room in your business budget to invest in your business so it can grow. Allow resources for the development of new products and services, for education for yourself and your associates, for interesting projects, and for advertising and marketing. Perhaps you could invest in a joint venture with another business owner, or spend a little cash to delegate tasks. You could put resources towards things like search engine optimization for your website, a regular “advice” column in a local community magazine, some yard signs and door hangers, or .towards a company vehicle.
Having my car fully wrapped was a good investment for me when I ran my decorating business. I got a lot of attention with my bright and attractive colors, and many people stopped me in parking lots and garages for my business card even though my phone number was clearly visible on my car wrap. I think people just wanted to say hello and strike up a conversation because the wrap was so extensive, so colorful, and so interesting. It was always a lot of fun, and it definitely led to business and great profits, meaning it was worth the investment.
6. Know your competition, but do not obsess over them
Understand basically how your main competitors function, and have an idea of their products, services, and prices. Then, find what you do that they do not, and brag about it. Know your competition, but never be obsessed with them or give them even one minute more thought than is necessary to serve your clients. FOCUS, FOCUS, FOCUS on what you do well and who YOU are, and shout it out in your wonderful, unique voice! Do not get sidetracked and caught up in the kind of negative energy that comes from fixating on another person or business. Focus on your customers instead, and you will enjoy amazing freedom and greater success.
7. Give your business time to grow
Do not be pulled off sides by get-rich-quick schemes, and do not expect instant sales and referrals just because you are in business. You must nurture and grow your business, each day doing something positive and meaningful towards your short-term and long-term business goals (which means you must have them and know what they are). This type of effort will definitely pay off, perhaps a little at first, but be patient and faithful in the little and you will see exponential and expedited growth once it all starts to take effect.
8. Have fun and be the kind of person people LOVE, LOVE, LOVE to be around
When you leave the presence of others, they should feel better for having spent time with you. Who wouldn’t want to do business now and in the future with a fun, positive, fair, and caring individual? You cannot separate “real life” from “business”. We are who we are, and know assuredly that your business success will reflect the kind of person that you choose to be. It IS a choice!
1. “If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.”
2. “Staple pages in the middle of the page.”
~Author unknown to me, could be Joe Crawford!
Today, business is ALL about relationships, and here’s a secret—it always has been. Everyday, we are either connecting meaningfully with others and building solid communities, or we are burning our bridges behind us.
In the past, savvy business people valued and romanced their customers, while business folks who wanted to blow off relationship-building and still create sales could get away with it simply by doing radio, tv, and print advertising. Make the ad or commercial good enough, and you will likely make a sale. Not so anymore.
Some say business is really tough now, because of constant change and social media, and mostly because of the economy, but what propels the economy is our behavior. Economics is NOT just the study of commerce and society, it is the study of human interaction around commerce. It’s not the economy that’s going up in flames, it’s our relationships (business—and family, too). Good relationships drive business. If the relationships go to H-E-double-hockey-sticks in a red-hot handbag, so do our profits.
Our lives are supposed to be easier these days with the explosion of technology, but instead, we hustle about in the blazing heat of many moments, trying to get too much done in too little time, exhausted from stress, and even exploding on occasion with Tweet-rage while we Twitter and text at our desks, on the toilet, at the supper table, and half-way off the road in our cars. We think we are relating to others because we are Tweeting or typing or posting. In reality though, we are not even relating to ourselves and to our passion, or to our true personal mission that makes sense to us at our core.
Utterly consumed by what “the experts” say we should be doing, and by what other business owners say are acceptable practices, we let the REAL, quality relationships fizzle, not sizzle. We dish out another hot plate of self-serving information, unprofessional communication, or cheesy, sleezy devises to get a sale, as we unknowingly allow prospects, clients, colleagues, and even family members to run like H E _ _ or fall by the wayside (preachy, I know—I just LOVE this stuff).
The constant heat and pressure to perform-before-thinking, and the frantic non-stop pace, has us force-feeding clients with unsolicited emails and low quality content as we bite the heads off of our employees and spew flames at our sales reps. Somewhere along the way we just stopped breathing. When was the last time you took a normal, deep breath? How long has it been since you took a day off to just take stock of where you are, where you want to go, and how you want to get there? Getting there is 90% of the fun (and it is the essence of life—the journey, never the destination). Many of us have stopped relating. Instead, we are filling up with the toxic smoke of business (and personal) HELLationships.
We need to stop, identify what is important instead of just doing “stuff” (online or off), and we need to take a good, hard look at what we really want to build. Then, we can take back the torch instead of setting everyone’s universe ablaze with our mess and confusion.
I often stress WHAT we should do (like I just did a second ago). This time though, I think I’ll have us all take a look at what we often do with our communication that puts our relationships in the fiery pit, leaving us frazzled, almost penniless, and with dwindling customers and friends.
The Newsletters from HELL (instead of Heavenly Heralding)
These are newsletters that are sent but not with permission of the recipient, which is so hard to believe in this permission-based new media society. They are often industry specific. A vendor joins a trade association and for a few measly bucks, the trade association gives the vendor the right to blast the members. Problem is it’s unethical and often illegal. Neither the trade associations nor the vendors have permission to send the mail, yet it happens a mazillion times every day.
Oh, and don’t think that because someone didn’t remove themselves from your mailing list, they APPRECIATE the mail you send them. I personally get a lot of unsolicited emails and campaigns that are humorously annoying 80 percent of the time, but I stay on the lists just to know what is happening in that portion of the industry, because I am a trainer and industry leader. I also stay because I get material for my writing (what NOT to do), and I stay because I know that I can simply delete the particular emails I don’t want, and as soon as that tool (and I mean that in the most unflattering way) becomes utterly useless, I can unsubscribe myself. I am a little different from a lot of folks though, and most reasonable people (I am not necessarily reasonable) would just hit the REMOVE ME FOREVER and DON’T DARE SEND ME ANOTHER UNSOLICITED EMAIL link.
Other hellish-type newsletters are those that come weekly with no relationship-building content. Nothing is FREE. Every bit of “news” is news of a “special”, a “coupon”, or a “one time only” offer (until next time). If you want to be amazingly loved while staying clear of looking sort of like the Devil, NEVER place a blatant add or a “BUY NOW” button in your regular email (a subtle, no pressure link to a product that opens in a separate page may be acceptable). If you want to email coupons and specials, reserve these for a secondary campaign that goes out monthly or twice a month so that the recipient knows what they are, and leave your main newsletter as a pure gift, FREE of charge and FULL of useful, inspiring, and helpful information.
Fiery Fingers (in Lieu of the Slow and Steady Hand)
Slow down those hot little hands! I received a business email recently where the sender used shortcut lingo to communicate with me. It looked sloppy and unprofessional, and frankly, it seemed amateurish and immature. It may be acceptable for your teenager to email, IM (instant message), or text a friend using poor grammar and letters instead of words (I dnt kno y u r not getting this) but it is shameful for a serious business owner to do so, no matter how many peeps are doing it. Quit the TEXT SPEAK.
Then there’s the quick and easy text to customers. I don’t think it is a good idea to text a customer, but you may have a good reason for doing it (but again, PLEASE, refrain from the ridiculous TEXT SPEAK). Why not pick up the phone for a few seconds and let them hear your beautiful voice? You can also email them (and DON’T assume the email went through if you don’t hear back).
Oh, and business owners, you can save the earth from hellfire by NOT hiring college graduates who cannot clearly and legitimately communicate to coworkers, leaders, and customers. The future of our economy depends on it. For an example of a real-life business complaint sent to Dell computers by a ridiculously ignorant customer (perhaps a college grad), click here, but wait until you read this entire message!
Igniting Rudeness (While Avoiding Good Manners)
Are you texting or Tweeting at inappropriate times, maybe while visiting with a client or sales person? Sort of rude, don’t you think? Delivery drivers and cab drivers are texting while driving. Trust me, I am NOT getting in THAT cab. Business associates tweet or text on the way home from the airport with their colleagues right beside them. We seek to strengthen a cyber-relationship when a REAL one is right in front of us.
Perhaps you do it while in a meeting or while listening to a keynote. There was a day when we would never have talked during a presentation because it was considered rude, yet somehow we have made it o.k. since no one can hear us “talking” under the table. Relationships are being built up or torn down by everything that we do or fail to do, and other people DO notice. We have allowed good manners and our high standards to fall like a drunk woman on crutches. Technology is fabulous, and can help us build wonderful relationships and strong businesses, yet we often use technology to intrude in our lives, rather than to enhance them.
Flame Throwers (in Place of Pool-Side Spritzers)
These folks burn you with their flaming one-liners and thoughtless, piercing quick words. Bosses, co-workers, and even customers can be flame throwers (by the way, those of use who are business owners should be especially nice when we are customers, knowing the challenges business professionals face). Flame throwers say such things as, “What the h e _ _’s wrong with you?”, or “If you had half-a brain you would…”, or “I will never shop here again”.
The Hot Head (Rather than the Warm and Fuzzy)
Hot heads speak before they think. They are like flame throwers, but their fury can go on and on. All anyone wants to do is get away from them. Hot heads often take things out on their families and assistants. Hot heads can brew for days, coming to work with a groan or a grimace instead of a warm hello. Hot heads cause business to plummet because no one in the office remains motivated, and even the nicest associates are distracted by bad feelings they often hold in. The customers as well as the profits suffer.
Blowing Smoke (Replaces a Breath of Fresh Air)
Folks who blow smoke come awfully close to deceiving others to gain a profit. They play tricks while acting slick.
If every bit of business communication should be geared toward building trust, it makes no sense then, to lead someone to a baited hook, only to have to communicate a brand new message—about how they “misunderstood” your offer—once they bite.
A popular acne solution company has a commercial on XM Radio that seems to me to be vague and almost misleading. The say that “against the better judgment of their management team” (yeah, right), a million people can try the product for no risk, plus they’ll get free medicine. The wording they chose for the commercial makes you think you are trying everything with no money outlay. Once you call in for the FREE offer, you get the real story.
Public service workers are not exempt from blowing smoke. Cops do it too (maybe that’s why we call them “Smokey”). There are plenty of didn’t mean to speed speeders who complain that a cop “padded” the ticket a bit, putting them in another price category. There are questionable business execs just like there are questionable cops. The sad part is, people quit trusting.
Have you ever seen the seemingly never-ending landing pages or sales pages of some of the online information products out there? They don’t reveal the price for two and a half hours. Why? Because you are stupid, and if you know the price right off, you won’t buy the product. I say, just tell me the price and don’t waste my time. I don’t need your psycho-babble customer psychology tactics that you learned from your friend who sells info products (who learned it from his friend, who learned it from a guy that ended up never selling anything). Don’t play tricks. Don’t make an offer that YOU wouldn’t believe or buy. Don’t blow smoke.
Burning (Instead of Earning)
Some business owners place articles (or audios, videos, etc) out in the online universe to drive people back to their sites. Unfortunately, many of these articles require the user to give information such as a name and email address before the article can be read (or before the audio can be heard or the video seen). I say (and droves of “experts” will disagree with me), either be a help to me or don’t, but quit trying to force me to give you my email address, and don’t use the ridiculous excuse, “If they want the info bad enough, they will exchange their info for it”, or my favorite, “I am qualifying my leads”. No, you are pissing people off.
Give and let give. Be a giver and the universe (I think that’s really God) will help you in the future. Plus, your prospects will likely respect you in the morning.
So There
So there it is (not all of it of course), but enough of a fire extinguisher to keep you from the flames of business HELLationships. Think about where you are and where you want to go, and how you will get there. Use your time, technology, and your business model to build exceptional relationships that will support your business, your staff, and your customers for many years to come.
“It’s a small world but still heavy. Stop trying to carry it all on your back.” ~Margo DeGange (Yes, me, that’s right. I can quote things too, ya know!)
Here is a life and business lesson that has nothing to do with products, little to do with numbers, and a lot to do with building real wealth and long-term security.
The word “simple” has been showing up in my life a lot lately. I want to share a few of those instances, so bear with me, because I have an important point in mind that may help you quite a lot.
A very long time ago, my sister had a dream that I often think about. In the dream, she was in a long hallway standing outside of a big courtroom. There were many people standing and sitting in the hall, waiting to go in to see the judge for the final judgment. One by one they would go in, and come out sobbing—both women AND men! After watching this scene play out over and over again, my sister finally asked one of the people who came out of the courtroom, “Why is everyone sobbing?” The answered surprised her as the person replied, “because it was so simple we almost missed it”!
I have recalled that dream many times over the last few days, and then this morning while in my car listening to a talk show, I heard the story of a mother who’s son was dying of cancer. He was at the end of his journey, when his mom got into the bed next to him. She was right beside him as he took his last breath. His final words were powerful, liberating, and sweetly authoritative. “Mom, it’s so simple”. His message changed her life forever.
Then, on that same ride in my car this morning, on another show, someone said, “Life is so short. Why should we live it in turmoil?” Together these words and stories provide a clear (and simple) message that I felt so compelled to share. Live simply!
In our businesses and in our lives, the joy is in the journey (just ask Steven King), and becoming simple-minded is part of a constructive and pleasant ride. Sometimes we get so focused on problems, on scenarios, on results, we miss the in-between, where life and business really happen. We can become too concerned and too intense wrestling with things that really don’t matter much in the long run. What will matter though, in terms of popularity, profits, and plain old peace of mind, is how you use your personal energy, and therefore, how you treat others and yourself.
Simplicity is NOT for wimps. Simplicity has enormous power built right into it. Keeping everything on an even keel, not thinking too hard, and offering a great attitude to everyone you see throughout the day takes unusual strength and deep character, and it is effortless if you let it become your new mindset.
The “thinking too hard” thing gets us in trouble many times, and it makes others uncomfortable, particularly when we expect our colleagues and coworkers, our family and friends, and even worse, our customers, to “get” what we are all freaked out about.
Keeping it simple also opens you up to the creative energy that is vibrating out in the universe (deep, I know). After exercising at boot camp and taking a long ride this morning, I went home for a few minutes and sat on the sofa, and closed my eyes. I wanted to just “be”, and I was keeping it simple (and not trying to). I drifted off into a cat-nap, and awoke a short time later with a brilliant business offering to provide to my Decorators Alliance members. I did not have to think hard, brainstorm till I was blue, get stressed out, or be in turmoil. The simple life just brought the idea directly to me, with no effort at all, and that idea will no doubt help many others.
Simplicity is actually something that elicits good business practices and the creation of incredible products and services that tend to be very profitable. Simplicity keeps us in a place of clarity, and allows us to move quickly at a moments notice, and change directions in an instant. It also helps keep our blood pressure down, and allows others to easily communicate with us, and willingly be around us.
A lot of stress is self-created and totally unnecessary (although sometimes no one could convince us of that). Simplicity is an attitude of choosing NOT to be in turmoil about anything. Things may not be ideal, but worrying, or worse, taking it out on customers, associates, and the people you love, cannot change anything in a positive way, yet your good attitude can change your world, and definitely your business, in ways you never even dreamed of. It’s that simple!
Our stress-free life of simplicity (and real power) proves itself in how we treat our co-workers, family and friends—how we honor our bosses and how bosses appreciate the people who work so diligently to build a company that is not even theirs.
Complaining, not seeing the bright side of things (no matter how dismal the circumstances), and being in turmoil make even great moments a drag, and challenging times pretty much unbearable, for everyone, including you.
Stop stressing. Be kind and laid back and SIMPLE, to others as well as to yourself, and watch your life and business burst into true wealth and profitability. People will want to be near you and work for you, and customers will knock themselves out to buy from you. They may even want to have you over for a simple drink!
“I’d kiss a frog even if there was no promise of a Prince Charming popping out of it. I love frogs.” ~Cameron Diaz
Most of us have heard the term “eat that frog”, which is also the title of a book by life strategist, Brian Tracy (a pretty good book by the way). The term suggests that if you want to actually move to a completely different place in your business and personal life, you have to eat a frog (or several). Unless you swallow that lumpy bumpy little frog, you will stay right where you are right now, and you will continue to experience the same things you do now. As a result, you will look, function, and feel just as you do today.
Eating a frog means taking action on something you know is super good for you, something that is not necessarily easy or pleasant (but may not be all that bad), and something that requires your determined will and focused energy.
Most people avoid eating frogs. That’s why most people aren’t all that successful. Some people like to look at frogs, and maybe pick them up, and some people even chew on the leg portion of a frog now and then if its fried and served with a little ranch dressing on the side, but most of us just do not like to eat a whole frog.
I eat frogs, and I am glad I do. In my business life, these digested frogs have put me in a better position than if I had decided to pass on the plate. Lately, I have even eaten a frog pushup or two, which leads me to sharing some business insight as I update you on my fitness boot camp progress (the Adventure Boot camp I’m attending with trainer Cliff Latham).
As I told you before, every weekday, I get up early (but now I’m sleeping in a bit—till 4:15am, youch), get dressed, and head to the park to allow Cliff and his staff to torture me for an hour. There are other people there getting tortured too. There used to be a whole lot more of them about a month ago, but since the torture is permission-based on the part of the participant, many folks now just stay in bed. The people who make it to boot camp are eating frogs.
So what does eating a frog do for people? For me in terms of boot camp, it makes me feel stronger, helps me to sleep better, and allows me to feel pretty good once the torture is over. Now, all kidding aside, it’s not really torture at all, it’s just a great deal of EFFORT, and it’s not easy. However, when I endeavor to stay with it, I feel great for the entire day, and best of all, I am moving along a desired life path, accomplishing something AMAZING—I am making my body healthier, so it will take me where I need to go, and be in good working order when I get wild and crazy celebrating all of my business successes along the way.
Eating frogs can certainly help you reach business success. Doing what you know to do but don’t feel like doing can be the best thing you do for your business and your potential profits, and if you eat the frog early on in your daily schedule, you have the whole day to feel good about it and to mediate on where that frog will take you.
This week, reflect on where you are now, and think about where you want to be in 1 year (2 years, 3 years, etc.) Decide what one thing (or two) you need to do to move you along to that better place—a place of real change and transformation. Break that desired result down into small projects and tasks (frogs). Every day or week thereafter, eat a frog.
The same way a body will look different over time if you eat the fitness frog and do the frog pushups, your business will look different (better) over time if you identify the frogs you need to eat right now and start chowing down.
Let’s think of our frogs as a type of business spinach. They make us strong, even super powerful, and over time as we get used to eating them, they actually start to taste pretty darn good. So go ahead, eat that frog!
“One reason so few of us achieve what we truly want is that we never direct our focus; we never concentrate our power. Most people dabble their way through life, never deciding to master anything in particular.” ~Anthony Robbins
In light of this week’s topic, I will get right to the point in this Monday Message.
FOCUS. That is the one thing we can do in any given day, week, month, or year to significantly change our businesses and our lives, and catapult ourselves to the top of any hill we resolutely want to climb.
For you in your business, FOCUS means to be purposeful, deliberate, and not easily distracted, and if you are distracted, FOCUSwill cause you to get right back to the object or task of your focus.
I am challenging you today and throughout this week. I am actually daring you (because a dare is much more fun and a lot harder to resist) to pick one task, goal, or intention, and persistently focus on it.
What to focus on doesn’t matter so much for this experiment (dare). What does matter is that you see what a determined focus can do for you. Consider a task, goal, or idea implementation you have been meaning to do but avoiding or procrastinating on (by the way, procrastination is almost always just avoidance in disguise). Is there something you have been putting off that is now nagging you relentlessly? Perhaps you wake up with it on your mind all too often–that one thing in the “back of your head” that you come back to over and over again in your thoughts but never do. Just do it.
Embrace your new FOCUSthis weekas if it were a wise coachwho will quickly get you where you need to go.
I started to give you some suggestions or examples about what to focus on this week, but I decided not to. I don’t want to skew your thinking or intention, or get you distracted from what you know in your heart you need to do, or from what you know can make a huge difference in your relationships, sales, or profits.
What do YOUwant to FOCUS on this week?
Here is the 1, 2, 3, to make it happen and to make it simple for you:
1. Pick a meaningful task or plan, to give your focus to— one that will really improve your life or your business in a significant way, and one that can be accomplished in a week or so with a moderate amount of focus.
2. Jot down a few directive actions you can take toward accomplishing it (but don’t get too deep into the planning, otherwise you may use planning as a type of procrastination).
3. Invest a significant amount of time each day this week toward activities related to this focus point.
Here are a few guidelines to keep you on track:
Guideline 1. Work FIRST THING in the morning so you don’t put it off (you can substitute morning for your most productive time of day if that works better for you).
Guideline 2. Get quiet and “away” for a pre-determined amount of time. Go to a place where you can concentrate,where you and/or your team are away from family, friends, customers, and common distractions such as obsessive emailing and phoning—-turn your cell phone to voice mail.
Guideline 3. Stay mentally focused on the task at hand. If a new great idea comes into play, write it down for later and remain focused on what you set out to accomplish during your session. Every other idea or task must take a back seat for a pre-determined amount of time each day.
Guideline 4. Do this for yourself; You really deserve that kind of focusin your life and in your business, since it is the ONLY way to forge ahead and actually reach the success you know you can have.
The difference between those who just have great ideas and those who actually become very successful in life is the art of FOCUS. A mediocre idea with deliberate focus will get you so much further than a great idea with no real focus. Think bout where you can be then, with an amazing idea coupled with deliberate and intentional focus.
I dare you. Pick a task, goal, or intention, and focus on it. At the end of the week, not only will you feel great, but you should see clearly how this accomplishment actually moved you toward a larger goal and a better life and business. Drop me a line and let me know how it all happened.
September 8, 2010 1157 King Richard I 1886 Siegfried Sassoon 1925 Peter Sellers 1932 Patsy Cline 1931 Jack Rosenthal 1933 Michael Frayn 1934 Sir Peter Maxwell Davies 1940 Frankie Avalon 1954 Ann Diamond
Designers' Camp
Twice-a-year online event for interior decorators and designers. Learn and network from your home or office. Save on travel. Improve your business.
Let's Talk About Decorating
Pre-made decorating seminars. Give customer presentations with ease. Gain clients fast. Script included.
Margo DeGange
Embrace your opportunities and live your dream. Resources and products to improve life and business.
Pre-Written Decorating Articles
Hate to write? We’ve done the work for you. Pre-written decorating articles. Use on websites, blogs, as handouts, and for flyers.
Pre-Written Decorating Newsletters
Need an E-newsletter, but hate to write? We do it all for you, and send them too, from YOUR email address! Exciting content, pictures, and tips. Gain MORE clients FAST.
The Deccorators Alliance of North America
Professional affiliation, industry certification, continuing education, and business support for the interior decorating and design trade.
Trunk Show Success System
Learn to do fabulous decorating trunk shows—put a trunk show system into place. Gain followers and see profits soar!
Monday Message from Margo 
Seeing others means you come from the vantage point that all of our lives, all of our wallets, all of our jobs, and all of our time schedules matter and are valued just like we value our own.
Eating a frog means taking action on something you know is super good for you, something that is not necessarily easy or pleasant (but may not be all that bad), and something that requires your determined will and focused energy.
FOCUS.